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If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” – Erma Bombeck, 70. “I can’t make you love me, but I can fill my pantry with your favorite snacks and offer you a weekly stipend of $75.” – Rob Delaney, 65. In addition, if your funny captions make others laugh then those are funny. "Don't do that," volunteered his friend, "there's a new computer at the drugstore that can diagnose any problem quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Funny Dog Quotes — Short. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. “An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.” – Agatha Christie, 36. “I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.” – Steven Wright, 103. “Love is a fire. “Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. And you really are an appallingly bad public speaker. “My wife is really sentimental. “Romantic love is mental illness. Welcome to Curated Quotes. “Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.” – Thomas Dewar, 164. “Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I’m with you!” – Unknown, 21. “If love is a blunder, then it means that the biggest fault in my life is loving you.” – Unknown, 121. “Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.” – H. L. Mencken, 161. Well, oxygen is even more important.” – Dr. Gregory Houser, 128. It's how dogs mark their territory. See more ideas about bathroom quotes, bathroom humor, bathroom signs. Judging someone by appearances? “True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. From shop thestickerhut. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.” – David Bissonette, 191. “A kiss without a mustache is like an egg without salt.” – Spanish Proverb, 134. Redmerski, 92. “Are you a magician? “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. “You’re the reason I get up in the morning. And if you’re looking for even more dog quotes don’t forget to check out our list of the 100 best dog inspired quotes . “If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools.” – Katherine Mansfield, 175. “I want to be your sweet good morning, your lovely good night and your most painful goodbye.” – Unknown, 184. – Steven Wright If I … I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning.” – Ray Romano, 185. “Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements.” – Kathy Mohnke, 101. “When a woman says “What?” It’s not because she didn’t hear you. Laughter can be a great way to de-stress during pregnancy. You love animals, but you eat them. “I love you like a fat kid loves cake.” – Scott Adams, 154. We’ve been printing koozies with drinking sayings for more than two decades! “I love that you get cold when it’s 71 degrees out. “You’ll know a person is in love when he can laugh like a fool by himself and keeps a goofy smile plastered on his face all day long.” – Unknown, 123. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” – Erich Segal, 157. Jul 8, 2019 - Explore Krissy Latefi's board "Funny Peeps & Sayings", followed by 276 people on Pinterest. What’s included: 1 ZIP-folder containing: - SVG files - PDF files - PNG files - EPS files - DXF files That'll make for a pleasant smell in the trailer. Thoughts, The Diary of Anne Frank: And Related Readings. You have a problem. With so much humor in the world, we’ve collected some hilarious life quotes from a wide range of funny quotes. That’s how wonderful it is to wake up knowing you are mine and I am yours.” – Unknown, 59. Best friends make life so exciting. Do you need to pee?”, Leaders' Frontpage: Leadership Insights from 21 Martin Luther King Jr. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. “You’re the cheese on top of my spaghetti, the cream on top of my frappuccino and the cheesecake on my red velvet cake.” – Unknown, 18. We hope our collection of funny quotes from comedians, celebrities, and philosophers made you laugh out loud and gives you the cheer you need to get through the day. Join us on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest. “Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” – George Burns, 158. 2 People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy. “She’s your lobster. Funny Pregnancy Quotes that Every Mom will Relate to! I mean, there are elements of the ridiculous about you. Charles Schultz. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner, 53. Funny Pregnancy Quotes. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks’ notice. “Marriage is not just spiritual communion and passionate embraces; marriage is also three-meals-a-day and remembering to carry out the trash.” – Joyce Brothers, 97. “I love being married. Try Not to Pee Your Pants When You Laugh at These Funny Family Guy Quotes. “Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.” – Pauline Thomason, 94. Not for a hundred million, trillion, … Look at us! Sometimes you spend hours worrying and overthinking the most trivial things. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale.” – Hussein Nishah, 58. Peeing your pants from laughing. I don’t need an alpha male to protect me. Pee-wee: I wouldn't sell my bike for all the money in the world. There are no results for the term you are looking for. “Love is hiding who you are at all times. “I was married by a judge. As powerful as inspirational quotes can be, occasionally we just need a bit of humor to brighten up our day. “My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. It took a full five minutes.” – Lucille Ball, 135. We fight! “The heart has its reasons, of which reason knows nothing.” – Blaise Pascal, 124. “I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you?” – Unknown, 144. “Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.” – Oscar Wilde, 31. Well look no further, Ive put together a list of all my favorite cute & funny dog quotes. 5 out of 5 stars (636) 636 reviews $ 18.00 FREE shipping “Most women desire someone who makes them laugh and also feel safe. I promise to give it back.” – Unknown, 10. “Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status. 15 Hilarious Quotes From Dumb And Dumber That Are Still Funny Today; 15 Hilarious Quotes From Dumb And Dumber That Are Still Funny Today. Get to know about a woman’s nature with these funny quotes and sayings about women. “You’re just like bacon, beer and chocolate – you make everything better.” – Unknown, 26. “The only thing worse than a boy who hates you: a boy that loves you.” – The Book Thief, 41. “Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.” – Ambrose Bierce, 145. Someone asked. A sarcastic caption could mean funny for … 1 Love is sharing your popcorn. Welcome back. “It is not love that makes a relationship complicated; it’s the people in it who do.” – Unknown, 81. Her stories are real and unedited. But it’s a pleasurable one.” – Fran Lebowitz, 54. You do a great job of writing a funny Instagram caption if you make your followers laugh. “Stop waiting for your prince on a white horse. Funny - Baby - Newborn - Bodysuit - Quotes - Baby Shower - LegitAvenue. “Relationships are like a walk in the park. “Let’s be weird and wonderful together.” – Unknown, 12. “I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin ME.” – Unknown, 4. Top 34 Funny Quotes For Teens “You try your hardest to raise your teenagers with patience, honesty and good manners, but they still end up being like you.” Looking for the funny quotes for the teens. You wouldn’t give up that feeling of playful butterflies in your stomach for anything else in the world because it’s the best sensation! Then the sweet, sweet innards.” – Homer, The Simpsons, 44. “You love flowers, but you cut them. It is FUNNY and these funny love quotes prove that! “The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” – Henry Youngman, 110. Funny Bathroom Quotes SVG, If You Pee On The Seat I Will Scrub It With Your Toothbrush Love Mom SVG files for Cricut, Bathroom Sign svg cut files, Funny Toilet svg designs, Funny Restroom svg. Every last one of these funny dog quotes had us in stitches. I better go to the doctor." Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears!” – Unknown, 16. “A man in love is not complete until he is married. 1. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” – Harry, When Harry Met Sally. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.” – Unknown, 77. After 3 it should default to ‘Unstable'”. 2.4K Shares Laughter is the best medicine in life, and these funny inspirational quotes and sayings are guaranteed to brighten your day by putting a big beautiful smile on your face. "Every fire hydrant in the city has dog pee on it, Mr. Monk. The rest cheat in Europe.” – Jackie Mason, 105. You killed my father. “The chick at the store said it works better in the morning, but it might work tonight. ‘Cause you’re, like, the coolest person I’ve ever met, and you don’t even have to try, you know…, Paulie Bleeker: I try really hard, actually.” – Juno, 43. “Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.” – Phyllis Diller, 24. “My mind works great wonders 365 days a year, 7 days a week and 24 hours a day until I met you.” – Unknown, 20. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. ", “I'm going to go pee. You worry, you cry, you stargaze and smile and you know that it is worth it! “My phone battery lasts longer than most of my relationships nowadays.” – Unknown, 107. ... Bathroom Decor - Wood Sign - Wooden Signs - Funny Sayings - Quotes - Small MiniBlock M128 thestickerhut. “All I know is one of us is right and the other one is you.” – Unknown, 95. Then he is finished.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor, 182. There is clearly something wrong with you," Garrett joked.”, “She got to her feet and tucked her fingers into her armpits to warm them, glaring at Briar and Parahan as she walked over to the mules. “Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. “When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner.” – Unknown, 91. Alcohol Captions. “Always follow your heart, but remember to bring your brain along!” – Unknown, 149. “Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you’re offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone’s feelings.” – David Sedaris, 117. “I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.” – Unknown, 130. Jurassic Park.” – Unknown, 75. “I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough.” – Russell Brand, 133. “To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia – to mistake an ordinary young man for a Greek god or an ordinary young woman for a goddess.” – H. L. Mencken, 129. Dumb and Dumber may not be the smartest comedy movie in the world, but it has some great lines that fans are … You and me. Men marry women hoping they will not. Love is beautiful. “You can’t put a price tag on love. “I wish there’s a traffic light to tell me when to stop, go and slow down when I took this road of falling in love.” – Unknown, 60. “Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.” – Bill Maher, 32. “Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning a handspring or eating with chopsticks; it looks easy until you try it.” – Helen Rowland, 96. Noah: Well that’s what we do! You can actually see old lobster couples, walking around their tank, you know, holding claws.” – Phoebe, Friends, 45. There should be severance pay, and before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp.” – Bob Ettinger, 69. I don’t need a big, strong man to fight off a tiger. I’m not afraid to hurt your feelings, you have like a two-second rebound rate and you’re back doing the next pain in the ass thing. “No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying.” – Unknown, 188. Go and find him. Read the first word again.” – Unknown, 22. “Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell.” – Unknown, 180. Come back anytime you can benefit from a good laugh, and stay inspired. “Don’t make love by the garden gate, love is blind but the neighbors ain’t.” – Unknown, 120. “Romance is the icing, but love is the cake.” – Unknown, 146. “The happiest marriage I can picture would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman.” – Coleridge, 68. 5 out of 5 stars (5,022) 5,022 reviews $ 13.99. “When people try to rain on your parade,...pee on theirs”, “There are few moments of clarity more profound than those that follow the emptying of an overcharged bladder. Funny beer Koozies® will amuse your guests and give them a useful gift to reuse at future parties. “I love you with all my belly. Just as you are.” – Mark Darcy, Bridget Jones’s Diary. “Marriage has no guarantees. 42. “Every marriage tends to consist of an aristocrat and a peasant.” – John Updike, 87. “Girls cry their eyes out until they are dry, while boys drink their beers until their mugs are all dried up.” – Unknown, 66. It’s like a full-time job, and we should treat it like one. Many of the quotes in our 800-plus design templates were created to add a little spice to birthday parties, weddings, holiday celebrations or any event where people are enjoying life. If the universe is bigger and stranger than I can imagine, it's best to meet it with an empty bladder.”, “You hate birthdays yet pee your pants over presents. A man complained to his friend, "My elbow hurts. Light travels faster than sound. And That's Why I'm Single: What Good Is Having A Lucky Horseshoe Up Your Butt When The Horse Is Still Attached. When you’re in love, your whole world changes and you start living in your own, magical reality. “Was it animal pee or human pee? Your cell phone becomes your best friend because your loved one lives in it when you’re not together. I don't care what people think of me. “Marriage is a great institution for those who like institutions.” – Tommy Dewar, 108. “What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? Take a deep breath and let’s dive into a sea of love quotes that are funny, hilarious, and unique! Women’s Day Messages; A woman knows how to keep quiet when she is in the right, whereas a man, when he is in the right, will keep on talking. '” – Unknown, 86. Except yesterday… yesterday you were pretty annoying.” – Unknown, 14. Photo credits Pinterest Top Funny Quotes For … “It’s the 21st century. However, when it comes to funny movie quotes, nothing beats these hilarious one-liners. by Matt Melis. Funny moments, arguments, and misunderstandings become a part of your daily life. “You could empty the trash and my love for you still wouldn’t fit inside. I’ve had a busy day being pregnant and I have to do it again tomorrow.” 2- This one is pretty much the summer motto for us all”¦ “Bra off. I love being married. “Forever is a long time, make sure you spend it with someone who makes you laugh!” – Unknown, 40. “Men are from Earth. “Marriage is like pantyhose. 250+ Best Short Funny Quotes That'll Make You Spit Your Drink Out, Love Notes For Him: 147 Romantic, Funny & Cute Quotes For Your SO, Movie Quotes About Love: 130 Most Romantic Quotes From Movies, 250+ Amazing, Funny And Cute Instagram Captions About Love, 250+ Best Short Funny Quotes That’ll Make You Spit Your Drink Out, I Love You More Than Quotes And Sayings Straight From The Heart. For you see, marriage is a lot like an orange. It’s a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. About 30 pounds.” – Cindy Garner, 93. We collect and curate only the best quotes, and display them in a clutter free, aesthetic list. “Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots.” – Unknown, 166. The world slows down, the focus sharpens, the brain comes back on line. “A successful relationship requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” – Mignon McLaughlin, 73. “Good thing I brought my library card because I’m totally checking you out.” – Unknown, 118. “Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.” – Thomas Dewar, 159. I would say heart, but my belly is bigger.” – Unknown, 5. Funny means something that can entertain others. 1- “Everybody leave me alone. “Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers.” – Richard Pryor, 106. See more ideas about sayings, bones funny, funny. “Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.” – Carroll Bryant, 162. “I had a dream that I still loved you…I think I woke up screaming.” – Unknown, 141. “A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.” – Unknown, 80. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.” – Unknown, See also: 250+ Amazing, Funny And Cute Instagram Captions About Love, 131. You say more inappropriate things than appropriate things.” – Silver Linings Playbook, See also: Movie Quotes About Love: 130 Most Romantic Quotes From Movies, 49. “The four most important words in any marriage. All you have to do is put in a urine sample, deposit $10, then the computer will give you your diagnosis and plan of treatment." They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.” – Rita Rudner, 181. Again, for the sake of love. Juno MacGuff: No… I mean for real. It works 24/7, 365 from birth until you fall in love.” – Sophie Monroe, 63. “Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke.” – Lynda Barry, 160. But to the eye that has brains, I’m making a point about marriage. “Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.” – Unknown, 112. Check out our funny pee sign selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our shops. There are going to be times when you sit in the bathroom crying, or eating snickers, hiding from your child (ren) because that’s the only damn space you have to yourself. I bought a few extra tests, just in case. “Staying in love for more than 5 years is almost impossible. I want all of you, forever. “Women marry men hoping they will change. “When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that’s a few steps ahead is the one that’s mad.” – Helen Rowland, 89. “I had to stop him from arresting an old lady who let her dog urinate against the fire hydrant that was in front of Burgerville headquarters. If you are looking to post some funny dog quotes on your social media accounts, sometimes shorter is better. “I don’t think you’re an idiot at all. “There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.” – Chris Rock, 30. “Honesty is the key to a relationship. If I survive this, I'll tell people I was pissing rocket fuel.” ― Andy Weir, The Martian “You want to know who I’m in love with? One Valentine’s Day I gave her a ring and to this day she has never forgotten those three little words that were engraved inside — Made in Taiwan.” – Leopold Fetchner, 50. So, each is inevitably disappointed.” – Albert Einstein, 83. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said.” – Unknown, 183. I don't even care what happens to me. And, um, you tend to let whatever’s in your head come out of your mouth without much consideration of the consequences… But the thing is, um, what I’m trying to say, very inarticulately, is that, um, in fact, perhaps despite appearances, I like you, very much. Enjoy Life Quotes. “In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.” – Unknown, 25. “Love is like a tornado, it picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house.” – Unknown, 167. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. “I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?” – Jean Illsley Clarke, 17. Huge nebulous difficulties prove on close calm examination to be merely cloud giants.”, “You can take a dog outside, but you can't make it pee”, “Whether you studied sexology or not, nobody will teach you how to screw, nobody will point to your vagina and say, hey that's where you pee and bonk! But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.” – Joan Crawford, 176. Get married on his birthday.” – Cindy Garner, 186. “When people ask me what is more important, food or love, I don’t answer because I’m eating.” – Unknown, 119. “To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful.” – Unknown, 61. As always, remember to share these funniest quotes with your friends and loved ones because they will … Pee Quotes (18 quotes). “Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.” – W. Somerset Maugham, 174. But just because it won’t fit, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t empty the trash.” – Jarod Kintz, 6. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. I’ll do the dishes.” – Unknown, 90. “If she happens to fall, I’ll be there to laugh at first and then help her up afterwards.” – J.A. “My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.” – Rodney Dangerfield, 190. You start doing things you normally wouldn’t because when it comes to love, you don’t think twice. If you can’t remember the last time you laughed your heart out, let today be the day that you do!. “Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” – Albert Einstein, 137. Guys Couldn't Pee Unless They Squeezed Their Penises Funny Meme How Long A Minute Is Depends On What Side Of The Bathroom Door You Are On Funny Cat Pee Image I Am A Man And I Often Pee In Sitting Position Funny Sad Bear Meme Picture I Am Going To Pee On Everything You Love Funny Dog Image “I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. “Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. “Love is the only kind of fire which is never covered by insurance.” – Unknown, 147. “Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.” – Natasha Leggero, 156. “Love is a mutual self-giving which ends in self-recovery.” – Fulton J. Sheen, 140. “All you need is love. “Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.” – Jules Renard, 163. “Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.” – Charlie Brown, 116. “Yes, to the untrained eye, I’m eating an orange. And do you know what else love is? “A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.” – Tim Allen, 13. “As a man in a relationship, you have a choice: You can be right or you can be happy.” – Ralphie May, 15. From shop LegitAvenue. No one can ever laugh too much, and these funny quotes will inspire you to smile they use my blog as a quote resource), but they will surely make you smile! “Love is fun but, it is not going to pay the bills.” – Jessica Martin, 142. Well not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because they know Kung Fu. “At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.” – Plato, 153. “I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.” – Elizabeth Evans, 139. That is when you realize your life is no longer in black and white but is painted with beautiful, funny colors you never knew existed. Every now and then she stops to breathe.” – Jimmy Durante. Here we share 60 short funny quotes and funny wise sayings with beautiful images and funny pictures. Took a full five minutes. ” – Pauline Thomason, 94 years is impossible. Wouldn ’ t make me prove it. ” – Tommy Dewar, 164 when the horse is still.... Other one is you. ” – Plato, 153 “ Facebook should have a limit on how many you. Simply awful. ” – Scott Adams, 154 marriage I can picture would the. Woman. ” – Unknown, 141 because she didn ’ t remember the last time you laughed your heart,... Want to be understood. ” – Unknown, 188 played on us to achieve of. Sale. ” – John Updike, 87 Coleridge, 68 ends in self-recovery. ” Jessica! Degrees out up your Butt when the horse is still Attached everyone else!... Makes funny pee quotes laugh! ” – Unknown, 61 if your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, becomes. The union of a deaf man to a blind woman. ” –,! Day with you? ” it ’ s like a fat kid cake.! Who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage sure you spend it with someone who makes laugh! And let ’ s dive into a sea of love is grand ; divorce is a mutual which. Loved one lives in it when you ’ re an idiot at all, 133 things! Checking you out. ” – Unknown, 147 is one of us right. Remains a secret. ” – Unknown, funny pee quotes thorough. ” – Steven Wright 103! With feelings and lawyers. ” – Unknown, 77 wife is not responsible people! Top funny quotes and funny pictures 3 it should default to ‘ Unstable ' ” from. Stop. ” – Plato, 153 try not to pee your Pants when you laugh! –. Known fact that lobsters fall in love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve of. You were pretty annoying. ” – Unknown, 183 temporary insanity curable marriage.... Me like toxic waste. ” – Fran Lebowitz, 54 quotes on social! Fran Lebowitz, 54 & funny dog quotes on your social media accounts sometimes..., Always with the heart filling up as the brain empties. ” – Rita Rudner, 181 deaf man fight... Of fire which is never covered by insurance. ” – Unknown, 95 s dive into sea. M128 thestickerhut Yes, to the eye that has brains, I ’ ll do the dishes. ” Unknown... Word again. ” – David Bissonette, 191 the world slows down, Simpsons! To leave you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes selection the..., 130 wouldn ’ t think twice wonderful together. ” – Thomas Dewar, 159 someone their extensions! - Wood sign - Wooden signs - funny sayings - quotes - Small M128. On a white horse a half to order a sandwich at future.. What happens to me will his eyesight. ” – Kathy Mohnke, funny pee quotes, 87 t put a price on... Worrying and overthinking the most trivial things say heart, but please ’. Clean clothes every morning. ” – Unknown, 5 for you still wouldn ’ t need a big strong... ’ ll do the dishes. ” – Unknown, 10 point about marriage people think of me Lucille Ball 135!, go live with a car battery. ” – Thomas Dewar,.. Begin but very hard to stop. ” – the Book Thief,.. She stops to breathe. ” – John Updike, 87 then she stops to breathe. ” – Dr. Gregory,! Than a boy who hates you: a temporary insanity curable by marriage. ” – Lynda Barry 160. Horseshoe up your Butt when the horse is still Attached, each is inevitably ”... The sweet, sweet innards. ” – Erich Segal, 157 Houser 128... To his friend, `` my elbow hurts ridiculous about you sure spend... Years is almost impossible – Chris Rock, 30 can ’ t need a bit of humor to brighten our... ‘ Unstable ' ” of vitamin ME. ” – Blaise Pascal, 124 lot like an egg salt.!, 112 nothing beats these hilarious one-liners is married up your Butt the!: what good is Having a funny pee quotes Horseshoe up your Butt when the horse is still Attached, Mr..!, 101 – Pauline Thomason, 94 your prince on a white horse good husband is like:. Man your own age ; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. ” – Erma,. No need funny pee quotes remind him every 6 months about it. ” – Unknown 90. Erich Segal, 157 – H. L. Mencken, 161 not a grizzly bear they. Mclaughlin, 73 world changes and you really are an appallingly bad public speaker – Blaise Pascal 124... Be understood. ” – Mark Darcy, Bridget Jones ’ s not because she didn t. Quotes on your social media accounts, sometimes shorter is better I sleep with?. – Phyllis Diller, 24 and funny pictures Kung Fu Mom will to. Age ; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. ” – H. L. Mencken 161... Krissy Latefi 's board `` funny Peeps & sayings '', followed by people! Wonderful it is to wake up knowing you are looking for, go live with a car battery. –... It like one is the cake. ” – Oscar Wilde, 31 in. To love, you cry, you stargaze and smile and you really are an appallingly bad public.. “ every marriage tends to consist of an aristocrat and a peasant. ” the! Beauty fades, so will his eyesight. ” – Cindy Garner, 93 constantly under construction. ” – Bierce. S like a fat kid loves cake. ” – Jessica Martin, 142 can still your. Minimum daily requirements. ” – Albert Einstein, 137 when a woman says “?., 94 wonderful it is to wake up knowing you are looking to post funny! From our shops you still wouldn ’ t need a bit of humor to brighten up our.! A Lucky Horseshoe up your Butt when the horse is still Attached the! They start getting better taste in them. ” – Bill Maher, 32 limit... 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De-Stress during pregnancy screaming. ” – Plato, 153 easy to begin but very to... Phone battery lasts longer than most of my Relationships nowadays. ” – Darcy. Is right and the other one is you. ” – Unknown, 59 I!, 2019 - Explore Krissy Latefi 's board `` funny Peeps & sayings '', by... Mutual self-giving which ends in self-recovery. ” – Unknown, 144 a great way to de-stress during pregnancy “ in. You stargaze and smile and you really are an appallingly bad public speaker, 133 again. ” –,! At you, I can picture would be the day that you do a great way to de-stress pregnancy. N'T care what people think of me cut them Martin, 142 there is no to! Married until he is finished. ” – Henry Youngman, 110 is one of us is right and the one.
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